{something borrowed} sharing the toilet with the boyfriend

OCD, hypochondriac, germo-phobe… pick one: I’m them all. I have adult issues with cleanliness and matters-of-the-stomach when it comes to food phobias. The majority of my obsessive-compulsive cleaning streaks ceased when we adopted cats. Because let’s be serious, OMG HAIR EVERYWHERE! I’m almost comfortable even with cleaning gunk out of the eyes.

*retch*

So, this recent story from Allure about sharing a boyfriend’s products (NOT ONE YOU LIVE WITH, MIND YOU) made me make that muscle-strained “ew” face. Being that AB & I have been living together for almost three years, we’ve stopped buying separate tubes of toothpaste, and I even share his shampoo after derby practices… BUT I’m sorry, it’s completely gross to use another man’s deodorant.

Years ago, I shared a toothbrush (once) when I visited SSD for a weekend when I forgot mine — not PURPOSELY forgetting — but, yes even though we swapped spit on numerous occasions, there’s something inherently grosser about male toothbrushes. And armpit hair. I cannot…

*gag*

Side, random note: do you and your partner pee with the door open?

Also, when you “purposely forget” your toiletry items when you stay at your boyfriend’s, remember that your period can start at any time, especially when you least expect it. True story. I’m pretty sure this and the Toothbrush Incident of 2008 was the same awesome weekend. I win.

For what it’s worth, I agree with the writer about men’s razors… and the smell of Irish Spring. I dated a guy once who used it (the soap), and I bought myself a package after we separated. Not because I wanted to smell the darn man anymore, but OMG that smell in the morning is downright fabulous. 10,000 better than “zest-fully” awakening. But I cannot share soap. Even the boyfriend and I have different shower puffs (there’s seriously 18 bottles of stuff in our shower). And when we have guests over, I can totally tell when they’ve used my bar, and I have to shave the exterior layers of it off before I can use it.

Wearing rubber gloves, of course.

The other side of this story — that the article so cleverly “forgot” to mention — is when you “purposely forget” your stuff when staying at your dude’s place, you run less a risk of losing out on hundreds of dollars worth of products, clothes and the best platform suede boots known to exist when he decides to Pancake your ass and never give your shit back. Just saying.

At least always keep a tampon on you.

{Allure.com: Products I Purposely Forget When Staying at the Boyfriend’s}

Photo credit: Psu4 via flickr

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