*blue balls not included.
I’m getting increasingly familiar with the Pittsburghese, even if mostly in jest.
In my quest to find the most hilarious words, I was told of “iceballs.” Or, as we referred to as “Sno-cones” in Ohio. This, of course, provoked me to research ridiculous forms of iced desserts for Penis Tuesday that look, sound or taste (ew) perverse. Which is a LOT, considering that sucking on a mere popsicle is reminiscent of the blow jobs your wife only gives you on your anniversary.
Better Than Sex has got nothing on this dessert list.
I told you last year about Viagra Ice Cream.
But there is also Frozen Penis (like a frozen chocolate banana in an ice cream cone.
And THIS awesome ice cream man prank
Next up, another ice cream flavor that is obviously not true, but entirely awesome. I mean, what a great idea — putting a gummy penis inside a dessert. Heh. Let your bachelorette party run wild!
And last, but certainly not the least pervy, so much more than cream-filled — where I need to have the world’s best doughnuts when I finally make it to Portland — VooDoo makes a “Cock-n-Balls doughnut.” Or a triple chocolate penetration, if that’s more your thing.
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This blog is about pursuit: a transplanted Clevelander (me) in a new city (that's you, Pittsburgh!), pursuing the role of a self-employed copywriter, becoming a roller derby badass and somehow merging all my to-do items into one ever-growing Bucket List.
And of MY boyfriend. His blue balls started this mess.
