Objects in mirror are closer than they appear.

Including that highway patrol trooper standing practically in the passing lane on 71-South.

It took five years, but I have another speeding ticket to add to my list. Shit. I was unusually nervous upon being pulled over this time too — and really, really pissed off and frustrated at myself. So much, that I cried. I freaking cried for the first time in front of AB because of a fucking ticket. I felt so lame.

Yeah… anyway. The cop was a dick (shocker), and he separated me from AB, and made me sit in the back of his cruiser, and accused me of drinking (because I was chewing gum), and berated me about “my guy not liking cops” yet assuaging the belief he was under the legal drinking age. WTF? This incident was ripe for blog, for sure. My first time in the back of cop car. Fabulous. And I was “only” going 76. And NO, I was not drinking. And YES the cop made me enter his car on the freeway side of traffic. Now, had I been drinking, me thinks this would have been a superbly dick move on his part.

Aside from that, we had an awesome weekend, with Friday and Saturday spent in Columbus for the Memorial Tournament. It was a pretty cool sight watching Tiger Woods golf in person — so seemingly effortless. We didn’t follow him throughout the course on Saturday — just the first and 18th holes — but regardless, it was a beautiful day to be outdoors, on the grounds of a gorgeous course.

Sunday, we checked out the Kamm’s Corner Farmer’s Market, and although there is a serious deficiency in produce, it’s a nice outdoor market. I’m really happy to have Ohio City Pasta there this year, and it was fate that I would finally run into “Cowboy” George from p’Zazz Hot Sauces in person. I also brought home some interesting local cheeses made with milk from grass-fed cows.

Fully indulging in all things organic, I also stocked up with groceries from Nature’s Bin in Lakewood. And OMG, found a Pimento Goat Cheese, which is FABULOUS!

What weekend would be complete without a couple additions to my DVD collection? You know, for all those lame weekends I stay home. Right? I found “Pee-Wee’s Big Adventure” (I’m not sure how this wasn’t already in my collection) and “2 Days in Paris” (one of my favorite more recent releases) at Record Exchange on Detroit. Sweet!

Now, a weekend to relax with art, movie, perhaps a bike ride and writing(!!). And the leftovers from my delicious Mexican Lasagna that I made this week.

Cheers!

You have until Tuesday to enter my Awesome Penis Tuesday Giveaway too! C’mon, don’t be shy! Or lie and tell me your boyfriend’s penis is really 10 inches long with the girth of a cucumber. Fabulous.

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