It’s just a hand!

The Frisky posted tits and tidbits in How To Tell If A Guy is Serious About You online recently. In expected fashion, guys buying flowers and stalking/jealous tendencies are classified as “not interested.” But using “we” in conversation, revealing intimate feelings and being nice to your friends (not including wanting to get with your friends) are on all included on their list to decipher his boyfriend capabilities.

While intimacy could be on the list in its vagueness (or could be result of a true player douchebag), one aspect I consider to be on the serious path is when and how he holds your hand. After suffering through a few relationships with insane voids in intimate touching (that did not include sex), I remembered how an action as small as another person holding your hand symbolized more.

Hand-holding seemed as such an huge first-act of dating when we were all younger. I’m fairly certain it counted as one the bases before we all knew and understood what sex was all about. We held hands with our girlfriends in junior high school because we were BFF and completely and wholly inseparable. We hold hands in support of family — at church, hospitals, funerals. To help or aid another person in and around obstacles. Or when the plane hits a rough patch of turbulence, you grab the hand of the stranger to your left (just me, then?). And if you’re my age, I’m certain you remember Hands Across America.

While a seemingly immature and unrecognized act, I view it as the ultimate measure of intimate affection. In public, you’re displaying to everyone, “I’m with this person.” It may seem too cute or pathetically overlooked in an anti-public display world of today (and of men I have dated that are completely out of touch with romanticism). Or worse — controlling and leading.

But stop for a second, and think about the potential of its affectionate meaning:

When walking over patches of ice in a chivalrous manner, his hand-holding could feel like “I’ve got you” in an unintended (sweet, not scary) measure of possession.

For security in moments of fear or uncertainty, you grab the nearest hand, thinking, I’ll protect you which feels very much like “I trust you enough to touch you.”

He reaches over on a drive in the car maybe because your hands are warm — maybe because you feel so far over there in the passenger seat.

Or as a result of nervous acknowledgment underneath or over the table at dinner.  Reminds you, “I’m here… I’m happy that I’m here with you.” Whew, makes me melt.

Not only the grabbing and the intertwining of fingers, but better yet, when the fingers caress over the back of your hand or in the palm in a constant reminder this other person is there.

And while asleep or half-asleep and spooning? That grip cannot be faked. Not only displays an “I’m glad you’re here (even while semi-unconscious in dreamland),” but makes you feel wanted in a way that seems all too forgotten. And… to get closer.

Does anything else truly reflect I like you like hand-holding?

No related posts.

Related posts brought to you by Yet Another Related Posts Plugin.