*blue balls not included.
This horoscope courtesy of Daily Bedpost cracked my shit up today:
taurus (Apr. 21st-May 20th)
It’s a good thing a bunch of family holidays are coming up, because you need some kind of speed bump on your highway of sin. And what better to keep your mind off of cheap and easy sex than a visit with your big, blue-haired Auntie Bertha? The only legs that should be spreading in anticipation of a good stuffing this Thanksgiving are the turkey’s.
Coincidentally, I both love stuffing and being stufffed. Well, those are about the only good things about Thanksgiving. And it looks as though I’ll have to offset being stuffed by eating more stuffing this year.
Which ironically indicates me being stuffed anyway. Woah, this post just became too big for me.
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This blog is about pursuit: a transplanted Clevelander (me) in a new city (that's you, Pittsburgh!), pursuing the role of a self-employed copywriter, becoming a roller derby badass and somehow merging all my to-do items into one ever-growing Bucket List.
And of MY boyfriend. His blue balls started this mess.
