Mel

Awesome Penis Tuesday Giveaway!

Best Google Search EVER: my bf’s penis is awesome Which prompts direction to Life, Liberty & Pursuit of Your Boyfriend’s blog giveaway! On behalf of Single Edition, I got some sweet sexy schwag to pass along to my readers. For the single and fabulous (exclamation point), sign up for Single Edition’s newsletter. And thanks to SE, I have some cool stuff to give away over the next...

Mel

Rain Delay

I put my weather on shuffle. Check out my Songs to Blame For the Rain over at Addicted to Vinyl. Duel post Day — ZOMG! Frequently, I see the Google Search “things to do with your bf on a rainy day” come up in my stats. It’s as if the rain comes and all of our relationships are doomed! I can think of 101 Things to Do With My Boyfriend on a Rainy Day. And 100 of them have to do with...

Mel

Google Says What?

how to fuck up an ex’s relationshipStalking, honey, all the way. Phone, internet, drive-by, drugging him then fucking him while he’s asleep and leaving the condom wrapper on the kitchen table. You know, the usual. i think i’m breaking up with my boyfriendYou think? You think? Jesus, you are or you aren’t. If you’re not sure what relationship status you’d like to...

Mel

Google Says What?

THE COLD WEATHER EDITION Jason Nicholas gay weather Does he do gay weather? In my best Wayne Campbell voice: I did not know that. boyfriends fuck Or do boyfriends suck? Awww, not mine, fuckers. THINGS TO DO ON A COLD DAY WITH YOUR BOYFRIEND Ugh with the ALL CAPS again! I’m going for a wine, take-out and game night with the man. Movies and hot chocolate with extra-extra, maybe large-sized…...

Mel

Google Says What?

Another day, another hour of developing superior bitch skills because I apparently have nothing better to do. But I would really love to hit something right now. And my laptop is about to get chucked across the counter at Caribou if this fucking wifi doesn’t stop loading up for me! Oooh, leaving work early. Soooo, here’s your Monday special (running around like a chicken with its head cut off...

Mel

Google Says What?

Yes, folks, it’s that time again. I’ve left you in suspense for far too long. Here’s this week’s best searches: 1. Break up with boyfriend, get drunk Take ten of these and call me at 2 a.m. 2. Do crazy things with your boyfriend Naked chinese fire drills? Skinny dipping in ponds in the neighborhood? Making S’mores, then smearing them all over each other while camping in the...

Mel

Boyfriend?? What boyfriend?

Pretty stupid shit is happening in relationships around the globe, so sayeth Google: 1. don’t let the pig ruin your life Yeah! And don’t let the cows or horses either! 2. how to make your boyfriend shut up I like a good bitch slap every now and then. (Remember, backhand… it’s ALL in the backhand). 3. how to get your sister’s hot friend drunk Here’s where the alcohol...

Mel

Google Says What?

1. Kick him in the balls Are you looking for my permission? 2. When your ex starts dating You should too! 3. Toast fuck Sorry, I’m more into bagels… 4. Imaginary boyfriends Just imagine that imaginary orgasm you’ll be having every night YOWSA! Puh-leez! What’s the matter with people? It’s so easy to find a man these days, why do you have to pretend? 5. Cleveland hot girls...