By now, the entire world over is aware of (and probably exhausted with) the Tiger Woods’ scandal. While most held Tiger in some high regard (as if he were above CHEATING on his wife), is it really all that surprising that an always-traveling, multi-million-dollar-worth professional athlete had marriage problems?
I’ve been wanting to weigh in on [...]
This year is nice. Yes, nice that I don’t need to complain all over my blog that I don’t have a boyfriend, and that I’m so lonely and the holiday doesn’t mean anything, puke, puke, puke… I like that AB & I have made plans to do our “Valentine” shit together (regardless of how I [...]
In a weird twist of randomness, I purchased a vintage desk online to eventually refinish into a bedroom vanity (you know, when a second bedroom exists in my life, and I have room for sanding and paint fumes). That in itself is not random (OK, perhaps if you didn’t realize I like vintage furniture it [...]
It’s Friday, so why not end the week with a slimy asshole story? I should invest in some rubber stamps
imprinted with the word “loser” so I can mark each new jerk… I’ll call this one Real World because at first meeting, he reminded me of a past cast member (with the same [...]
I’ve been lucky to not have the pleasure of running into any exes lately. Save for the ones with whom I am actual friends… and that have maintained a low profile in the douchbag categorization. This past Wednesday, while out with AB, I came one degree shy (of running into, not becoming a douchebag myself) [...]
The ass who stood me up last week? Texted me Saturday:
What are you up to tonight?
While I imagine he could have been drunk at 4 in the afternoon (I was, for sure), what the fuck is all that about?
Being that he reappeared a week later, I could only muster, “Are you kidding me?” from [...]
Bet you didn’t think you would see me this morning in your Reader, eh? Yeah yeah. So much for self-imposed blogging hiatus, but really, Fuck You. Nobody ever said I was good at playing by the rules. Or religion for that matter.
This disservice brought to you by “I have a dating story doozie,” which goes [...]
1. Surround yourself with friends
This makes for an obvious “duh,” but I really enjoyed spilling my unwanted emotions over kafta rolls and fatoosh at Nate’s Deli and releasing the fury of my fruit and cheese cravings at the West Side Market. Follow that by a night of laughing at Cleveland’s Douchebaggery at Cadillac Ranch & [...]
Yes. HG and I are done. But let’s make this retroactive to our initial meeting, shall we, Shady McShadester?
I did not want to date him. I did not like him. I did not trust him. I canceled our date(s). Then I gave in after his persistence in wanting to take me out. HIS. And partially [...]
I was all ready to post a 1,500-word essay this morning, but for whatever reason my document saved as blank on my jump drive. I swear if it’s not saved on my laptop when I get home, I will bash nuts.
Meanwhile, some Monday entertainment forwarded from a friend today in e-mail. Good read. I’d like [...]
After chortling over a received text message with the words: date FAIL!, I thought about what makes for a good date and likewise for the bad. Cleveland Magazine asked me a similarly worded query years (ack, five) ago, and I think it’s still on point. Activity-based dates are still on the top of my list; [...]
I purged some more numbers from my contacts on my cell a couple weeks ago. Not surprisingly, after an endless stream of holidays wishes came via text, I received a message from an unrecognized number with a “Happy Thanksgiving” attached.
It was all caps too, which just makes it doubly annoying.
That’s too much (sexual) information. Courtesy of Dear Sugar - Weird Sex Statistics (and I’ll work through the quiz with you).
Question 1: How long does the average sex session last (foreplay not included)? Seven, 11 or 18 minutes?
This makes me feel very, very sad. Kind of like the time when I dated a guy that [...]
10SB left another voice message today. Why he bothered is beyond my scope of understanding. Even in his message he sadly proclaimed, “I know you’re not going to return my call.” And again, he hopes I am well.
I forgot. Didn’t he say in his last message - OVER A MONTH AGO - that he [...]
Ew. Found an e-mail that I sent to a friend at the beginning Mr. Waffles:
Subject: You deserve it!
I think you deserve a big “thank you” from me today. Yeah, I know it’s early on with whatever status our relationship is and all that crap, but I feel as though meeting him means there are [...]
I got “that look” from my sister when we at dinner together over the weekend. Not to be confused with “that” look, obviously. But that look of smug disdain while I rehashed my story of 10SB’s attempt in trying to communicate with me (multiple times) since the breakup, and my apathetic-ness towards it all.
That look [...]
I have to admit, Internet folks that my “clean sweep” was by far the best decision I made to move on from Mr. Waffles and others not-worthy-enough-to-be-named. After deleting numbers and email addresses, I continued to facebook and myspace territory, following the same suit.
By the by, don’t you love when another “friend” knows when they [...]
Today we turn to Yahoo! for our relationship pick-me-upper:
Dating 101: Why Guys Dump Girls They Dig
1. The timing is off
Ahem, bullshit. Your fucking watch is not broke. But my biological clock is ticking, bastard.
2. We’re Not Finished Playing the Field
Fuck off! Then go punt a foot into your balls.
3. We’re Fixated on the Worst-Case Scenario
I [...]
I have had enough.
Of drunk texting complete randoms, that is. And exes.
While some of my messages were ridiculously humorous (and naughty), others, well, were just ridiculous.
So, after my return to civilization (blah), I deleted about 20 numbers from my cell phone contact list.
Were you one of the lucky ones to stay?
Probably not, douchebag.
But you can [...]
I was reading an article online about cheating and the fantasy of coming face-to-face with the wench that ruined everything (of course, I can’t find the article now, but whatever, you get my drift). This happened to me, but in a very, very strange way, with a slightly satisfying outcome.
I was in a long relationship, [...]
Life, Liberty...
