Weekend, much? Well, then let’s begin.
It was a weekend of a thousand birthday celebrations, but for the same friend — another 30-year-old addition to the club. Friday night, we started with bar food and brews at Slim & Chubby’s. Mmmmm, BLT and giant salad. (Note: I ruined my diet this weekend with really crappy food. [...]
will take me here. For no reason, other than I have wanted to stay at this gorgeous hotel for as long as I can remember. And it would be silly romantic. And I have never been to Washington, D.C. And this could possibly be the best date ever.
Thanks to my meandering into web things I do not completely understand, you might have noticed there was more than a little glitch with your favorite web reading pleasure yesterday. I still have a few little quirks that I need to tweak (ugh with this stupid contact form — I cannot remember the code fix [...]
The world is such an awesome place when you have work clients that share their great baseball seats and never-ending bar tabs.
Not so awesome is waking up on a Friday morning… and feeling like ass.
The hedgehogs over at one of Cleveland’s major banks shared their fourth-row-behind-the-visitor-dugout Indians tickets to entice us to add another new [...]
My favorite definition of the word “bull” is of the vulgar variety: a ludicrously false statement; nonsense.
Suggested by quoted e-mails between Mark Dann and his office love slave, Jessica Utovich, The Columbus Dispatch revealed Thursday that the ever-endearing moniker “bull” is the true pride of Mark Dann — his penis.
In an e-mail from Utovich to [...]
BM: Why do your boobs jiggle like that when you laugh?
Me: Because they’re real.
Me: I had a sex dream about you.
BM: We were having sex?
Me: Yes, I must have missed you while you were on vacation.
The decision to wallow with a Cold Stone signature creation at Crocker Park was futile. While I realize it is practically impossible to keep calories at a minimum, I opted for the Sinless sugar-free version of the Apple Pie a’la Cold Stone, as to not provoke a sugar-induced evening of insomnia. Sure the sugar was [...]
I think I’m done with the east side for a while. I mean, save for commuting to work already EVERY day. This past weekend of driving killed me. Fortunately, my new rugged tires seemed to enjoy the lovely highway travel.
I have a cousin that just graduated from St. Ignatius. It was bittersweet, being that his [...]
Penis cold? Knit your man one of these! Yes, these are the homemade instructions for a penis warmer.
The fun doesn’t end there! Visit Naughty Knitting for more kinky do-it-yourself fun. But please, stay away from those itchy wool yarns.
And that’s all she wrote, folks. Knitting, penis, balls. OK, just had to get that out of [...]
After drinking a few Mojitos with my sister and brother-in-law, we attempted to come up with some good locations for me to meet new men.
1. The obvious starter, with my new biking hobby, would be somewhere in the Metroparks, beach, lake, river. I will keep my eyes open for the All-Purpose Trail Hottie.
2. Why do [...]
While not being particularly interested in all-things-dating lately, I felt maybe the feelings and desires of the male anatomy just left me.
Then I went for an hour bike ride in the Rocky River Metroparks last night. I was reminded of the appeal of those strong pieces of man meat with every passing 30-something hottie with [...]
Yeah for Mario Lopez. Douche-bag extraordinaire just got nominated by People Magazine for its Hottest Bachelor issue. Do you remember when I met him four years ago? Just gross. He was nasty then (inside and out) and is even more disgusting after his barrage of blah reality shows.
Consider this your kick in the ass, Slater. [...]
While I love pretending my emergency fund is an excuse to take a vacation, today I played “big girl” and took my car in to be serviced. After my last experience with the rental car in Germany, I was none-to-plussed to find I would be borrowing another auto today. While the service department is picking [...]
I received my Community Health Connection newsletter from St. John West Shore Hospital in the mail yesterday and there was a great back story on several of the Lake Erie Monsters players visiting patients.
And there he was… Dan DaSilva. *swoon*
Ahem, Dan, I’m SINGLE!
Inspired by my latest track on my myspace profile, I went in search of the best songs about the penis.
First up, a song to break the ice. The Bloodhand Gang is hilarious. I remember purchasing this album and tearing up from laughing so freaking hard. Enjoy “The Bad Touch.” I mean, just the Furries visual [...]
Twice in the last week I had dreams about SSD. (For those folks that don’t remember, the guy I dated a couple years ago). The first was rather tame. We just happened to be in the same place at the same time. Nice stuff. Last night’s sequence, he played a starring role (in the same [...]
Ah, weekends. I spent a lot of time with just myself this weekend, but I never felt alone. The strangest thing I realized after an errand-busy Saturday, was I had this perma-grin on my face. There was nothing particularly humorous on TV at the end of my evening. I was just smiley. Weird. It was [...]
I had another brief relapse into Boyfriends of Mel’s Past today:
He was a long-distance guy, so when I would make the four-hour trip to see him after a long work week, he had a bath ready for me when I arrived. GOSH, I loved that tub! While I don’t think either one of us was [...]
Leave it to Mel for another bonus to Penis Tuesday, with a special Friday the 13th edition!
Here’s the list of phobias, specifically sexual in orientation. Use your dirty mind, people.
Androphobia - Fear of men
Anuptaphobia - Fear of staying single
Carnophobia - Fear of meat
Chiraptophobia - Fear of being touched
Coitophobia - Fear of coitus
Cypridophobia - Fear of [...]
For investigative purposes, I had to delve into the psyche of modern-day hoochbags. What better way to start than to search my personal photo files to see if I was also an early-20-something hoochie (NSFW!!). Research concluded… I was.
Ladies and Germs, I give you Hoochie Exhibit “A” (Sorry, they’re all in pdf, as we did [...]
Life, Liberty...
