Mel

I’ll be right back, bitches!

Geesh. Impatient persons! I have been busy with this (uh, welcome to Cleveland State)… and this (work has been stressful and yet I STILL need a second job!)… and this (YOU try squeezing in 3-4 days of cardio!). Shit. This too (Vegas plans for October with a 44-minute reservation conversation with United via satellite from Pluto which is no longer a planet). I have not ignored the space because...

Mel

I’ll be right back, bitches!

Geesh. Impatient persons! I have been busy with this (uh, welcome to Cleveland State)… and this (work has been stressful and yet I STILL need a second job!)… and this (YOU try squeezing in 3-4 days of cardio!). Shit. This too (Vegas plans for October with a 44-minute reservation conversation with United via satellite from Pluto which is no longer a planet). And sadly, this (I cannot find...

Mel

I like to call it “The Disappearing Act,” but whatever…

Urban Word of the Day www.urbandictionary.com August 23, 2006: pancake 1. To end a relationship suddenly. 2. To break up with an individual without prior warning. 3. To get dumped by someone and remain clueless to the reason. 4. (Personal addition): What happens to Mel every time she seems to get serious about a guy. (With appropriately enough — THIS post). 1. “I pancaked the...

Mel

“You’re 99.5% my type”

Ever have one of those mornings when it was so exceptionally pleasant to sleep in late (alone) on a Sunday tangled in the ownership of clean sheets and pillow cases and not on a borrowed couch from Saturday night (or, say, the drivers seat of your automobile)? Such a blessed, blessed moment. What pisses me off as said late arrival to the morning ensues is the anticipation of the brewed coffee. Flo’s...

Mel

“What happens on MySpace, stays on MySpace”

Yes, I’m almost 30-years old and I’m on MySpace. (Whatever, fuckers). This morning while nursing a hangover created solely from the Tanqueray-n-Tonics that were force fed to me by Craigslist (okay, you’re only partly to blame) during Ladies’ Night/New-Boy Thursday, I perused my new messages and “Friend Requests.” Being completely inundated by lame-ass (which is so much...

Mel

$1 drafts, $1 hot dogs… and extreme close-ups!

Courtesy of your local Lake County Captains. Pleasure spot this evening: PJ Hiser off the DL! Free waffle from Waffle House  (a’ la Conroy Grand Slam… Conroy, right?) and free fries at Arby’s (again, from another home run). And after-game party honors go to none other than The...

Mel

“She’s the ugly one, right?”

I’ve been up to plenty of no-good the last week which in turn has left me minimal amounts of free time to conquer the site summaries. Here are some highlights: Last Sunday I finally made it to an Akron Aeros game where I melted… not only for temperatures in excess of 80 degrees, but the hotness they like to call Trevor Crowe. Okay, so not only is he incredibly good looking (yeah, I saw him...

Mel

Guy B at Jacobs Field

Within seconds of approaching the bar at The Jake last night, a hand with dollar bills extends with a bold “I got that!” Staring towards the anonymous Beer Buyer, I thank him — since obviously, I am not one to turn down offers of free booze — and he walks away. (Warning: Dramatic Foreshadowing will occur in 10…9…8…) That seemed too easy. My friends walk up from...

Mel

Not a Finga!

I don’t venture out frequently to the east side of Cleveland much these days seeing that I’m borderline end-of-the-earth western Cuyahoga County, but had some bridesmaids’ duties to attend to after my busy workday. Yucking it up with the ladies over a couple beers, stuffing envelopes with impending nuptial invites, our travels end in downtown Willoughby. Having remembered a fantastic...